All the time on everything.

Been a while since I’ve written one of these not quite as long on dropping a multi-course meal for a large group.  In cooking, humility is a wonderful thing yet most cooks don’t have much.  Never right, never a grand slam regardless of what the guests’ praise – it’s just never as good as you imagined it should be.  Which is good otherwise everyone on earth would be eating the over processed fake food most of the U.S. seems to be consuming at an absurd pace.  Anyways, here’s the menu:

So I’m a bottle of vino down and going to knockout this sweet little treat.  A recap from a dinner I had the pleasure of doing for a few friends last weekend.  For those that were there, you’ll recall measuring wasn’t really a part of it so use these recipes as a guide – go light and add as needed.

Lump Crab Avocado dip w/ wonton chips:

1# Jumbo Lump Crab – cleaned

1-2 ripe Avocados – Small Diced

½ bunch of Cilantro – Minced

15-20 Mint Leaves – Shaved

¾-1cup of mayo

Dash – Paprika

1 Jalapeno Minced

Dash – Siracha

Lime Juice – To Taste

Salt – To Taste

Combine everything into a bowl except the Avo & Crab.  Mix everything together well & taste – adjust as needed.  Add in crab & avo carefully toss together.

Take fresh wontons & cut into triangles (cut the square wonton wrapper in half – I know that caught somebody…) On a greased cookie sheet fill up w/ the triangles.  Lightly spray triangles w/ veg oil spray & lightly season w/ kosher salt.  Place in a 350 degrees for 10-15minutes – remember that these bastards burn quickly so keep an eye on them – think sexy deep tan on a Greek chick – that’s about perfect color for baking wontons.

Prosciutto & Cantaloupe Salad:

This recipe is hella easy and always a crowd pleaser – toss the baby arugula in as a tasty filler w/ some bite & added color.

1 Cantaloupe Small Diced

1/3# Prosciutto (Have deli guy slice it pretty thin w/ no paper btwn slices) place in freezer immediately

1 pack Chives Shaved – about 1/4cup

Apple Cider Vin or Ice Wine Vin or Some funky Vin that’s light & a bit fruity

½# Baby Arugula washed

1 pinch Kosher Salt

Take the prosciutto out of the freezer and immediately slice into thin ¼” strips.  Shred/separate the prosciutto slices.  Toss together the cantaloupe, chives, prosciutto slices, arugula.  Put salad on plates & lightly sprinkle the salad w/ your funky vinn or just skip it – honestly the vinn is just to make conversation w/ your dinner guests of where you came across this wonderful culinary delight and how they must go online and order their very own (you can do that people – stop buy that crap at the supermarket).  This can be made ahead of time and kept in the freezer.

Stuffed Tenderloin:

This next one you can use beef tenderloin, pork loin, or pork tenderloin – the cooking process is basically the same, just adjust the cooking time on the size of your meat – hahahahahaha.

1 Beef Tenderloin cleaned – head on or off (the butcher will know what this means)

8-16oz Cherve Goat Cheese (little extra for the Mashers)

1# Baby Bella Shrooms – Minced

1 Sweet Yellow onion – Small Diced

1/4 tsp Fresh Rosemary – Minced

½ tsp fresh Thyme – Minced

3 Tbl fresh Flat Leaf Parsley – Minced

Slavo Salt – B/C it FUKN rocks!

Okay, it’s about to get mid-evil here and the opportunities for “that’s what she said will abound.”

Right, so take your tenderloin & slap it down on the board in front of you.  Now take your steele – better known as the metal rod in your knife block that you don’t know how to use but think clinking it against your knives will magically sharpen them – yeah that thing.

Now very gently cram  (I love that word) the rod down the center of the loin.  In a repeating motion, plunge the rod through the center of the loin creating a clear cavity – careful not to penetrate the walls.  Repeat on the opposite end making a quarter size tunnel through the center of the loin.

Now in a frying pan sauté the onion w/ the mushrooms, until the shrooms moisture is cooked off remove from the heat.  Toss in the fresh herbs plus the goat cheese, & Slavo Salt in a different bowl.  Mix super well & toss into a pastry bag w/ a medium tip – remember just the tip.  Now slowly massage & work the goat cheese mix through the cavity you made w/ the rod earlier.  Keep working the mix through the loin be patient and careful not to blow the mix out of the side (if you do, no need to freak-out just be careful w/ that spot while cooking).

TO cook – you can pan sear it in oil or toss it on the grill.  Either way, you’re going to crust it in Slavo Salt and finish it in the 500-degree oven until it’s medium rare after grill/sear regardless.  Let it rest on the counter-top for about 10 minutes or so before cutting.

Balsamic Broccoli Rabe

First, blanch the broccoli in SALTY WATER and chill.  Dice ½ yellow onion and sauté in grape seed oil over high heat until translucent.  Next, toss in the broccoli and cook for a couple minutes.  Drizzle 1oz balsamic vinn, Slavo Salt, & 2Tbl butter – toss & serve.

Goat Cheese Truffle Mashers

Boil Yukon gold potatoes in water until cooked through and strain.  Toss in 1/3 cup of butter, 1/3 cup of skim milk, Slavo Salt, 1oz truffle oil and the remaining goat cheese mushroom stuffing left over from the tenderloin (all of it).  Mix until smooth with a hand mixer.  Adjust seasoning as needed.

Caramelized Peaches w/ Mocha Mascarpone

Cut peaches in half and dust heavily w/ sugar.  Place on a screaming hot CLEAN grill for 2-3 minutes.  Meanwhile, take 8oz of mascarpone cheese, 1oz coffee, dash of Carmel flavoring and mix well.  Spoon or pipe w/ a pastry bag the mascarpone mixture on top of the grilled peaches.  Drizzle w/ a good honey and lightly dust w/ cayenne or chili powder for a little added zip.

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Cooking is much like golf – it can make you feel like a God when things go right while making you mad as a hatter when they go awry.  Likewise, when you golf with people that are better than you, your game is often elevated beyond your usual play.  The same applies to cooking.  Cooks and chefs are a relatively transient bunch.  There are several reasons for this, but the most common rationale is for the continued growth and perfection of their craft.  To truly become a top caliber chef, one must work closely under the most skilled and talented chefs they can find.  Charlie Trotter is said to have worked in well over 100 professional kitchens in his early years of cooking.  Mind you this is not corporate America when job hopping is frowned upon, but rather a chef’s resume displays more who you have worked for and in what capacity instead of how long you stayed in one place.  The resume will get you a conversation with the chef – your skills under fire will get you a job.  Talk is cheap in the world of kitchens and having graduated from a culinary school carries relatively little weight (I refused to hire anyone out of culinary schools – even though I was a graduate myself). [click to continue…]

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